Our Unhooked Culture

Last year I came across the book Unhooked: How Young Women Pursue Sex, Delay Love and Lose at Both. The author, Laura Sessions Stepp, interviewed girls in high school and college about their experiences in the "hookup culture" and how this has affected them. I think I read most of the book last year, but I recently bought it to re-read. Tonight I finished Section One: "Hooking up: What it Means."

Stepp explores what "hooking up" means, which, she discovered, cannot be specifically defined. It could be anything from kissing to sex. When she interviewed students at Duke they came up with answers such as "don't have to work for it, immediate gratification, no relationship, lack of communication, no emotional fulfillment, and doesn't teach intimacy" (Stepp, 21). People find glamor in these random hook ups because they see them as fun, effortless, and they find a false value in doing so.

It is the complete opposite of what we were created for. God created us to feel love, and yes, to feel pain. Sexual intimacy is for the union of two people, a man and a woman. It is to be self-giving, not selfishly taking from the other person. And love isn't just a feeling, it is what we have to be, what we are called to do. How can you love another person by using them for your self benefit? Love is tough, sacrifice is difficult, but we are called to discipline.